Things didn't really start out great today. Mostly because I hate my straightener. Only because it doesn't actually straighten anything. And in my opinion if a device doesn't do what it's NAMED it's a piece of crap. My straightener should be called hair-ripping-frizz-inducing-time-wasting-piece-of-crap-ener.
It's a superficial thing, I know. But I don't feel good about presenting myself to the general public as a hot mess. Hideous beast is not a good look for me. And if I don't feel at least semi-decent looking, how am I supposed to feel at least semi-decently about anything else?
Mostly I'm just in a really b****y mood. My body is pissed that yet another egg has gone unfertilized and is punishing my husband by turning me into a town-crushing man-eating monster.
That's why I've decided that you, mother nature, are a whore. I don't want to pop out a baby. And I think it's really cruel that you make me bleed and writhe in pain every month just because I refuse to submit to your selfish desires. You're a terrible, terrible lady.